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What's the Deal with Unified Communications?! (UC - the Seinfeld Edition)

February 13, 2015 by

Was Seinfeld the best sitcom of the past 25 years? Fans of Friends, Mad Men, and the The Sopranos would certainly have something to say about that, and everything they said would be wrong, because the answer is clearly "Yes, obviously." But it's fortunate that Seinfeld premiered when it did. If the show came on the air today, we might have missed out on some of its most iconic moments, thanks to the advent of unified communications.

Bubble Boy Triumphant

George and Susan are speeding along the highway en route to visit the Bubble Boy, and George is ecstatic.

"Can you believe this?" he says to Susan. "No traffic! We're making fantastic time!"

Jerry, following along in a second car with Elaine, is less enthusiastic.

"Look at how fast he's going! That idiot, I'm going to lose him, and he's got the directions!"

Elaine rolls her eyes, pulls out her phone, and initiates a video conferencing session with Susan.

"Susan, would you mind telling George to drive just a little bit slower? Jerry's having trouble keeping up."

"I'm going 10 over the speed limit!" Jerry says in the background.

Susan delivers the message, George slows, and the group arrives at the Bubble Boy's house together. And when the Bubble Boy tells George that it was the Moors, not the Moops, that invaded Spain in the 8th century, Jerry's there to arbitrate.

"The Moops? You think it was the Moops?" says Jerry. George begrudgingly moves on to the next question.

The Bubble Boy wins the game of Trivial Pursuit, his bubble intact.

Cartwright? Cartwright?

Jerry, George, and Elaine are at the Chinese restaurant, waiting for a table, and they're getting antsy. They were supposed to be seated what feels like days ago, and they're now in danger of missing the beginning of Plan 9 From Outer Space.

But that's not all - George is in a delicate place in his relationship with Tatiana. He wanted to invite her to dinner, but when he called he reached her voicemail. Now he's stressed because he's afraid she'll show up after they give up on getting a table and head elsewhere.

"What about your presence solution?" says Elaine.

Of course! George updates his status: "At Chinese restaurant. Leaving if no table in 10 min."

A little later, Tatiana shoots George an email, saying she can't make it tonight but she'd like to see him tomorrow. As George's relationships go, that's pretty close to a marriage proposal.

The maitre d' goes about his business, the words "Costanza" and "Cartwright" never entering his mind.

A Matter of Appearances

A funny thing happens to George when he leaves his car in the Yankees parking lot for a few days: He starts getting noticed - in a good way. Steinbrenner's the first to arrive and sees George's car is already there, and his supervisor sees the car when he leaves for the day. George gets a reputation for working longer hours than anyone else. Suddenly, he's up for a promotion. So, naturally, he decides to stay out of the office as much as possible.

"Do you think this is such a good idea, with you being on the verge of this big promotion?" says Jerry.

"My presence, in that office, can only hurt my chances," says George.

But of course, even George needs to get some work done here and there. That's where fixed mobile convergence services enter the picture. With these tools, he can use his personal phone while using his office number. He can go up to Susan's cabin midweek and make business calls, with no one realizing he's actually out of town.

It's the perfect plan - except that his car gets covered in flyers and bird droppings, so Jerry takes it to get washed, but crashes it, leading Steinbrenner to conclude that George has died. This is Seinfeld, after all.

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